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The Truth About Parenting / What I’ve Learned

January 4, 2014

As a soon-to-be-mother-of-two, I tried today to remember exactly what it was like to be the parent of a little baby. Whether the haze of over 3 years’ worth of broken sleep has erased much of my memory of that time or my biology has enforced a sort of rosey glow around it, I admit I don’t remember a whole lot. A few general things do stick out though:

This too shall pass
In the film Memento, Guy Pearce’s character, Leonard, tattoos himself with clues to help him with a short-term memory issue. Whilst my life’s not quite as dramatic as all that, I like to think of the sentence tattooed in Hebrew on my wrist as a little aid to remind me that “Gam zeh ya’avor”- This too shall pass. It’s a big smelly cliché but what I’ve learned about parenting is that the time does pass- sometimes too quickly, sometimes too slowly. When it passes too quickly, you wonder how your child grew so damn fast and why you didn’t ‘cherish the moments’ a bit more. When it passes too slowly, you ask yourself what the shizzle made you decide to breed and whether you’ll ever see the other side of this.

There’s no one-size-fits-all ‘way’ concerning babies or parenting
There are the phases- many different ones and the hardest bit is that NOBODY is the same so you simply cannot read a book or ask Google. There is no one-size-fits-all and anyone who thinks there is, is in my opinion deluded. Go ahead and read books of course but ask people who seem to share your values and parenting philosophy for recommendations so that you’ve already ruled out any crap that’s only going to make you feel like a shit parent. Consult sources you trust but even then, sometimes even they aren’t 100% in the right so pinch of salt, people!

It will suck massive hairy balls some days
Babies cry for no apparent reason, they don’t sleep when you’re already fit to drop and they don’t do an awful lot in the first months apart from keep you on your toes so thank Mother Nature for glorious mother-hormones!
When your baby grows into a toddler, things become even trickier: They move around of their own accord and slowly but surely develop little personalities, which will try your patience until you feel your head might explode.

But on some days, you will be in awe of just how amazing you and your child really are
You’ll feel like high-fiving a randomer on the street in those which I like to call ‘moments of parenting win’: When your baby sleeps through the night for the first time; on seeing the first smile or witnessing something specific to your baby that’s absolutely the most special thing in the whole wide world for you (if completely alien to the rest of the world). The absolute euphoria when your child says his or her first word (especially if it’s the noun you call yourself!) makes the days that suck hairy balls pale into insignificance and, like me, your biology or failing memory may even cause you to forget the bad days and choose to start that parenting thing from scratch more than once!

Look at what a difference 3 years and 7 months make!


3 Comments leave one →
  1. January 5, 2014 03:33

    Let’s be friends! Love your blog…

  2. January 5, 2014 12:41

    Just moments before you posted this, I read this post from another blogger. My angel just turned five months…this was refreshing. 🙂

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